STORIES WE TELL

There are a number of ways to teach English. Most are wrong, some are worse. Then there are stories. Stories are great. They draw the students in, keep them interested and make learning a little less of a chore. Of course, these need to be good stories (which are in short supply) and they need to be written in an English that native speakers actually use and that also corresponds with the students' level of English.

Anyway, suppose you have never tried telling a story in your classes but are now willing to take some chances by doing so. Finding a good story is the first step, and a pretty difficult one. Knowing how to make the most out of it is even harder. That's where I come in. I've been using stories in my classes for years and I believe I can help you out.

The assumption here is that you actually want to use stories in your classes, that you are fairly competent and open to new ideas, that you want to challenge both yourself and your students, that the students are reasonably excited to improve their English, that they are willing to listen and that they do not carry guns. If any of these conditions is not met, the whole thing is likely to result in an epic failure, especially if guns are involved.

The following story comes from a children's book, The Flying O'Briens. Its literary merits aside, it contains the exact kind of English that needs to be taught. Every English teacher worth their salt should see right off how many interesting bits the below excerpt contains. If you as a teacher were to analyze every single one of them in detail, this story alone (besides taking weeks to get through) would be more enlightening to students than any standard textbook this side of the Sun.

Things We Do On Christmas

On Christmas Eve Timo and I had to go to bed early. We were supposed to keep up all the Santa Claus stuff for the benefit of our little sister Kate. My parents wanted us all to go to bed early so they could get busy putting gifts under the tree. I could tell there was something Timo wanted to get off his chest. So when we climbed into our beds, I was quiet and waited for him to speak first. Sure enough, he soon started telling me that he knew what I was getting for Christmas. "I saw it in the attic of the garage," he said. "But dad made me promise not to tell."

At first I didn't believe him. "What were you doing up in the top of the garage?" I asked. He didn't say anything for a while. It sounded like he was having trouble making up a convincing lie. Then he said, "Promise you won't tell. I thought maybe they hid my presents up there. Dad caught me sneaking out, and I told him I was looking for that radio you built." "And he believed you? I haven't seen that thing in years." "Sure he believed me. I'm a pretty good liar, aren't I? But I can't fool you." "Not with a story like that, you can't."

"How did you get up in the top of the garage, anyway?" I asked. "Dad must have been up there that day. He left the ladder down." "So what am I getting?" I asked. I didn't believe him completely, but I was beginning to think he might be telling the truth. "I promised not to tell." I had no idea what I was getting. I hadn't been able to think of anything to ask for. Anything I really wanted, I knew my parents couldn't afford.

I don't believe in asking for impossible stuff, although when I was a kid I used to ask for a pony or a monkey or something like that. This year I had told my mother that she could surprise me. I had no illusions about her idea of a good gift. I knew she would get me a pair of shoes or a new coat. I don't consider clothing a good Christmas present, but then I didn't have any better suggestions.

"What difference does it make if you tell me now?" I always made the mistake of trying to reason with Timo. "I'm going to find out in a few hours anyway. Plus, I don't believe you saw anything." "Yes you do." "Just shut up and go to sleep," I said. I was losing my patience. "Don't you want to know what you're getting? I'll give you a hint." "If you don't shut up, I'm telling on you." "Mom!" Timo shouted. "Brian won't stop talking." That boy sure has some nerve. If mom heard, she didn't do anything about it.

Anyway, the preceding text would probably be best suited for intermediate and advanced students. In a less advanced class it might lead to popping sounds and brain matter dripping from the walls. Here we will be working with a simplified and shortened version that even less-advanced students could handle. However, most of the pointers and notes are applicable across all kinds of texts.

On Christmas Eve Timo and I had to go to bed early. We were supposed to do all the Santa Claus stuff because our little sister Kate still thinks that there is a bearded guy who brings gifts to children. Our parents also wanted us to go to bed early so they could start putting gifts under the tree.

While we were changing into our pajamas, I could tell that there was something that Timo wanted to tell me. But I kept quiet and waited for him to start talking. As usual, it didn't take long. But what he said was a lot more interesting. He told me he knew what I was getting for Christmas. He said he'd seen my present in the garage earlier that day.

At first I didn't believe him. "What were you doing in the garage?" I asked. He didn't say anything for a while. It sounded like he couldn't think of a good lie. Then he said, "I thought maybe they hid my present in there. But I only found yours. I told him to stop lying but at the same time I wondered if he was in fact telling the truth.

When you're done laughing and wiping off the tears rolling down your cheeks ("You've never actually met my students, have you?"), look below to see what I think you need to focus on whatever is underlined, basically. Yes, these are the phrases/grammar (later referred to as INN) that your students should either learn or reinforce the knowledge of. Cue laughter/tears again.

On Christmas Eve Timo and I had to go to bed early. We were supposed to do all the Santa Claus stuff because our little sister Kate still thinks that there is a bearded guy who brings gifts to children. Our parents also wanted us to go to bed early so they could start putting gifts under the tree.

While we were changing into our pajamas, I could tell that there was something that Timo wanted to tell me. But I kept quiet and waited for him to start talking. As usual, it didn't take long. But what he said was a lot more interesting. He told me he knew what I was getting for Christmas. He said he had seen my present in the garage earlier that day.

At first I didn't believe him. "What were you doing in the garage?" I asked. He didn't say anything for a while. It sounded like he couldn't think of a good lie. Then he said, "I thought maybe they hid my present in there. But I only found yours. I told him to stop lying but at the same time I wondered if he was in fact telling the truth.

Obviously, stories are not the only way to teach English. But remember, there's more to each story that the storyline. In fact, the storyline is the least interesting part, at least in terms of teaching. If you know what to focus on and how to convince the students that you know what you're doing, you can use every story to cover a lot of ground. And it's much less boring, too.

INTRODUCTION

Most stories call for a short intro to kick things off and get the students' attention. NOTE: You can kill a wonderful story by introducing it badly. "So I have a new story for you today. It is about a boy..." is a surefire way of putting your students to sleep.

So, we all know what happens on Christmas Eve, that is, December 24, right? In many countries, little kids have to leave the room where the Christmas tree is for a while so that their parents can put gifts under it.

Then the kids are called back and the parents explain that an angel of some sort has brought them gifts. The kids then run to the tree to open all the gifts and are excited to find the things that they asked for. Or not.

In some countries, like the U.S., the kids aren't allowed to unwrap or even see the presents until the next morning when they wake up. That way, the parents have the whole night to put the gifts under the tree.

VOCABULARY

The introduction will take you right to vocab. Write all the vocab that you think your students aren't familiar with on the whiteboard beforehand. Then, explain all of it in English until the students that actually pay attention understand the meaning of each word/phrase. Do not allow the students to use any Czech while you're talking. All they're allowed to do is to nod and/or contribute to your definition. When you're done explaining, ask the students to guess the correct Czech translations of each word.

ACT act means basically the same thing as behave; when for instance a dog ACTS strange, it runs around or rolls around on the ground or bites its own legs

PRETEND when you don't believe something but you act like you do, you are PRETENDING (for instance, some of you pretend to be listening to me but in fact you are texting someone on your cell phones)

FIND OUT when someone badmouths you, says bad things about you, but you don't know who they are, you need to FIND OUT, which you do by asking other people and getting information from various sources

RELATIONSHIP when two people have a good RELATIONSHIP, they like each other and like spending time together

BEARD is the hair that grows on both sides of some guys' faces, around their mouths, all the way to their ears

CHANGE INTO you're wearing something but you want to wear something else what you do is you take off your clothes and CHANGE INTO new ones

CAN TELL when you're good at reading emotions, you CAN TELL for instance that someone is unhappy even if that person is smiling; you CAN TELL if someone is drunk by the way they move or talk

TAKE (TIME) you can say that it TOOK you five years to learn English

a WHILE if you stay somewhere for a WHILE, you don't stay forever you probably don't stay a very long time

EARLY (výslovnost) make sure you pronounce this word correctly, as in "I have to get up EARLY tomorrow so I don't miss my flight"

HID / HIDE when I have something and I don't want anyone else to find it, I have to HIDE it; like, parents have to HIDE Christmas presents from their children before Christmas because the children have likely been looking for them since early December (see, there's 'early' again)

LIE when you say something that you know isn't true, you're LYING

Then, follow up with the rest of the INTRODUCTION. It's always a good idea to speak as one of the characters. This particular story is actually narrated in ich-form, which makes it easier for you. In other stories you may need to adjust your perspective.

When I was a little kid, I believed there was this guy named Santa who brought gifts to kids who'd been good. Then my older cousin explained to me what really happened on Christmas Eve.

I was a little disappointed and so I went to my parents to make sure that I understood correctly. They told me that my cousin was telling the truth but asked me to keep pretending that I still believed in Santa.

The reason was that I had a brother and a sister, both younger than me. My brother's name was Timo and he and I didn't have a very good relationship.

By the way, Timo found out about Santa before I did but he never told me. My sister's name was Kate and she was only six at the time. Our parents didn't want her to find out about Santa until she was older.

Just to be sure the students have followed the storyline, ask them to recount the intro briefly (in pairs this goes for any conversation). Once that's out of the way, you can move on to the actual story.

TELL STORY

There's no need to stick rigidly to the written version (by reading it off the paper, for instance). It wouldn't sound natural and it might turn the listeners off. What you need to do instead is draw them in and keep them intrigued throughout, which you do by improvising and immersing yourself (and them) in the story. (It won't hurt to use the historical present--it makes every story sound a lot better.)

So. It's Christmas Eve, right, and Timo and I are totally excited. Timo is my brother, as you probably remember. Anyway, our parents decide to ruin our evening by telling us to go to bed early so they can put the gifts under the tree. That way, we will wake up tomorrow morning and run over to the tree and the gifts will be waiting for us.

Now, we're both old enough to know there's no such thing as Santa Claus. But we have a little sister, whose name is Kate, and who still believes that there's this bearded guy who brings gifts to children. So we have been doing the Santa stuff all day long just for her... [rest of story]

INQUIRY

When you're done telling the story, make sure the students understood by asking them lots of questions, covering every little detail. (Oddly enough, students seem to enjoy this activity.) You can also use this time to fill in details that you skipped while telling the story. Again, it's fun to speak as one of the characters, preferably a different one (Kate?) just to confuse the students a little.

So who puts gifts under the Christmas tree? (Your parents.) No! (Uh... Santa Claus?)
Yes. Who else? Duh. Anyway, what does Santa look like? (He's a big bearded guy.)
When does he do this? (In the night.)
Does anyone ever see him? (No.)
How come? I mean, why don't we kids see him? (Because you have to go to bed early.)
Who says we have to do that? (Your parents do.)
How many brothers and sisters do I have? Are they younger than me? What are their names? Do they have a good relationship? What did they talk about later that night? etc.

How do you know that introducing a story in class wasn't a complete waste of time? First, when all is said and done, the students need to be able to translate the underlined bits (INN) fairly quickly, and correctly, if possible (see POINT-OUT). Second, they need to be able to come up with their own sentences using all the INN from the story.

BOLD-INN

Hand out lists of INN and have your students use them (the part after # is a contextual hint, the bold bit is what they absolutely must use). It's ok if they keep saying the same thing over and over again in different ways as long as they do a good job grammatically. Note the changed perspective.

THERE IS # Kate think bearded gifts
I still believe that there is a bearded man who brings...

WANT SB TO DO ST # parents bed early
Our parents want my brothers to go to bed early tonight...

PUT # after bed gifts tree
That way, they will be able to put the gifts under the tree...

CAN TELL # Timo want say st!
My brother could tell that I wanted to say something...

WAIT FOR SB TO DO ST # quiet, he talk
Timo's quiet and Brian is waiting for him to start talking...

a LOT MORE # what say interesting
What Timo is saying seems a lot more interesting than what...

(TENSE SHIFT) # say see garage
[Timo said that he had seen what our Dad was hiding...]

BE DOING # ask "in garage?"
Brian is asking, "What were you doing in the garage?"

THINK OF # sound: no good lie
Apparently, Timo can't think of a good lie at the moment...

STOP -ING # tell no lie
Brian is going to tell me to stop lying because he'll believe that...

BE SUPPOSED TO # Santa stuff
The boys are supposed to do all the Santa stuff today...

WHO # kids think gifts
Most little kids think that there is a guy who brings...

SO THAT # must early: put gifts
The boys will have to go to bed early so that our parents can...

WHILE # pajamas: Timo speak
While they're putting on their pajamas, Timo is about to...

THERE IS # want say something
He's saying that there is something that Brian needs to know...

TAKE # not long start talk
It never takes very long for Timo to start talking...

(TENSE SHIFT) # say know I get
[Timo said that he knew what Brian was getting...]

AT FIRST # no believe truth
At first, Brian doesn't believe that Timo is telling the truth...

a WHILE # say nothing
So he says nothing for a while...

YOURS / MINE # Timo think hide gift
["I thought the present he was hiding was mine but in fact..."]

WONDER # tell truth?
Brian seems to be wondering if Timo is telling the truth... KEYWORDS / GUIDE

Then, take away the BOLD-INN sheet and hand out the guide sheet. This sheet contains no hints regarding grammar (as opposed to BOLD-INN).
All it does is provide hints about the storyline (also, some hints are intentionally confusing: THINK TRUTH? --> I wondered if he was telling the truth.).
See if the students are capable of using the INN bits without being spoonfed. Again, note the perspective.

XMAS BED, SANTA SISTER THINK
--> On Christmas Eve we'll tell the boys to go to bed early...

PARENTS EARLY --> GIFTS TREE
--> We're going to get them out of the room early so that we can...

PAJAMAS --> WANT SAY
--> While they're putting on their pajamas, Timo will...

QUIET --> WAIT TALK, NOT LONG
--> Timo won't stay quiet for too long. Brian will be waiting...

INTEREST --> SAY KNOW GET XMAS
--> Brian will be interested in finding out what Timo knows...

SAY SEE GARAGE --> BELIEVE?
--> Timo's going to say that he's seen me hide something...

GARAGE? REPLY? --> SEEM GOOD LIE?
--> Brian's going to ask Timo what he was doing in the garage...

HIDE MY? --> ONLY YOUR
--> Timo will explain that he thought that his mom and I were...

STOP LIE! --> BUT THINK: TRUTH?
--> Brian will ask him to stop lying but he will wonder if maybe...

QUESTIONS

Less advanced students tend to struggle with questions. If that's the case with your students, use this exercise to help them overcome this deficiency.

ZJISTĚTE:

proč museli jít spát brzo
kdo jim řekl, ať jdou spát
čí sestra je Kate
jestli je Timo jiný než on
jak jste se měli chovat
jestli Kate věří na S. Clause
jestli existuje S. Claus
Why did they have to go to bed early
Who told them to go to bed?
Whose sister is Kate?
Is Timo different from you?
How were you supposed to act?
Does Kate believe in Santa Claus?
Does SC exist? Is there a Santa Claus?

co Santa Claus dělá
komu nosí S.C. dárky
proč chtěli rodiče, aby šli spát
kdo dává dárky pod stromek
jestli mají stromek
jestli začal Timo hned mluvit
jak poznal, že T. chce něco říct
jestli Timovi řekl, to řekne
jak dlouho to trvalo
What does SC do?
Who does SC bring gifts to?
Why did you parents want you to go to bed?
Who puts gifts under the tree?
Do you have a tree?
Did Timo start talking right away?
How did you know that Timo was going to...
Did you tell Timo to say it?
How long did it take?

co na tom bylo zajímavého
jak zjistil, co B. dostane
proč mu nejdřív nevěřil
jestli někdy chodí do garáže
čí dárek tam Timo našel
jestli Timo říkal pravdu
kdy ho napadlo, jestli nelže
What was so interesting about that?
How did he find out what you were gonna...
Why didn't you believe him at first?
Do you ever go to the garage?
Whose gift did Timo find in there?
Was Timo telling the truth?
When did you start to wonder if he was...

HINT: ZJISTĚTE ... jestli to ví
INCORRECT: If he knows it?
CORRECT: Does he know?

SPIN-OFF TEST

Now, let's be honest. This is a fairly short story and it'll get boring verrrry quickly. Throw in some spin-off exercises to keep things interesting. The following test will do nicely. It's easy enough that you don't have to explain anything beforehand. (The students should be familiar with most of the grammar.)

děcka, chceme, abyste šli spát
nenuťte nás ještě nikam chodit
sorry, ale jsou určitá pravidla
jak to, že vy nikam nemusíte?
copak nejsme vaši rodiče?
to nic neznamená
kids, we want you to go to bed now
please don't make us leave yet
sorry kids, there are rules
how come you don't have to go?
aren't we your parents?
that doesn't mean anything

co byste dělali bez nás?
nebojte, budeme v pohodě
kdo vám kupuje věci na jídlo?
kdybyste nám dali peníze, dokázali bychom to
co když vám ty peníze nedáme?
pak s náma bude zle
what would you do without us?
don't worry, we would be fine
well, who buys you things to eat?
we could do that if you gave us money
what if we don't give you that money?
well, then we're in trouble

Interpreter-Style. Simply read the Czech lines one by one and give the students 3-4 seconds to mumble each translation under their breath (alternatively, they take turns translating in pairs, or each does one half, whatever works). The students basically act as interpreters, meaning they have to translate each line somehow, even when they don't feel too confident about their efforts.

Do ALL the lines first, THEN give correct translations. Repeat in the NEXT class or later in the SAME class. Next, EMAIL/PRINT out the Czech version and assign it as homework. Analyze translations in class. Use common errors to explain grammar. Bring the test back one more time a month or two later, It will be greatly appreciated.